Live A Possible Life

I spoke at the eighth grade graduation ceremonies at my daughter's school today.  This is what I said:

Good morning, parents and friends.

Good morning, graduates.

Before we present diplomas, I have the privilege of saying a few words.

First, to parents and friends.  In many ways, educating children is difficult to measure.  The effects of one particular day with a teacher may not show up until long after graduation, and in ways that we least expect.

Graduates like Robert Fisher, who opened our ceremonies this morning, demonstrate that the value of an SCDS education goes far beyond simply preparing students for high school.

One of the goals of Sonoma Country Day School is to prepare children for a future that is unknown. What will stand our students in good stead when they reach their 20s, 30s, and 40s?

There are three critical traits that we seek to imbue in impart to each of our graduates:  autonomy, intellectual curiosity, and the ability to create and maintain meaningful relationships.  You can measure the value of an SCDS education by the way those three things show up in these graduating eighth graders.

I am certain that, like me, you were touched, moved and inspired by their speaking this morning.

And that is why I invite ALL our parents to attend graduation ceremonies.  This is the proof of the pudding, and it can’t be expressed as a number on a 100 point scale.

And now to our graduates, who I am sure are anxious to get off the stage and be with their parents, relatives, and friends.

I know that today is filled with excitement, so if there is only one thing you remember from my comments here today, it should be this:

This is all made up.

By that, I mean that what appears to be “the way things are” is really just invented by people.  You, each of you, get to invent what your future will be like.

The danger is that there are lots of negative influences.  You can invent a future where “I’m no good at dancing,” or “That’s too hard,” or “I could never do that.”  Where would we be if Mr. Shannon believed that 8th graders can’t sing?

During your time here at SCDS, you have been surrounded by a culture of possibility.  It’s reflected in our pledge (“This day is given to me fresh and clear…”) and in the stone outside (“Our search is for those moments and situations when we are most alive”).  It’s so powerful, it even affects your parents, and they suddenly believe in the possibility of beautiful gardens and parties for hundreds of people.

Mr. Nix, your teachers, and your parents all believe very deeply in “the possible you.”  Observe that the rest of the world may not think that way.

What I’m really saying that every moment you have a conscious choice in how you live your life.  Listen to what you say to yourself about your life, because as you say it, you invent it.  Listen closely to how others speak about their lives, and surround yourself as much as possible with possibility.  Be possibility for other people, as your teachers have been for you.

Live a possible life.

Because, after all, it’s all made up anyway.  Make up something wonderful.

I wish each of you the greatest success in this life-long pursuit.  And I hope that you’ll come back often and share how it’s going.

(delivered at Sonoma Country Day School, June 8, 2005)

Comments

[Adam DuVander]

Here's to optimism, eh? This was something that my parents were pretty big on. I didn't consciously "get it" until college or later, but I think it was always in my actions.

I like the way you phrased it. "This is all made up" probably resonates with eighth graders.

Congrats on the good speech. You received an honorary middle school diploma, I hope.

[Dossy]

Mike,

I think you missed your calling as a commencement speech writer. :-)

I wish there were an analogus school in New Jersey to the SCDS. I wish I had the opportunity and expertise and resources to start one.